I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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