Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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