I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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