So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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