I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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