Nicole vs. Life
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
a search helicopter?!
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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