Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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