Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
