I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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