Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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