Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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