I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Everything about him screamed your future.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
bring money and cleavage
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
