So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Randomize
