If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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