You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Randomize
