road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
you will always have a special place in my vag
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
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