As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
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