Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
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