gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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