Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Randomize
