Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Randomize
