just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
