You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
