Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Randomize
