At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
COCAINE IS GR8
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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