Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
Randomize
