just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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