I looked at my own cervix.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
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