Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
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