Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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