My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Randomize
