i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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