Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
This is my gift to your gina
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Randomize
