How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
My balls are so social today.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Come back. Shots need mouths.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize
