Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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