Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
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