All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize