exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
My dick has a subreddit
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
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