Fine. I'll sleep in my office
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Randomize
