Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Randomize
