; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
