It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
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