So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I AM VODKA MAN
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Randomize
