She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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