He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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