thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
