Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
