I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
