I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
