I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
