I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Randomize
